Requiem For A Dream

Lone Bird, Dark Sky

One of my older photos, quite appropriate for this post:  “Lone Bird, Dark Sky”, shot on black and white 120 film using a Diana F+ camera. 

A dream I had in the early morning hours of November 11th, 2014:

I am sitting in a beautiful courtyard, enjoying the view, when I realized that the grass is covered in dead birds. There is no chirping, no sound. Every bird is on the ground, motionless, each one fallen from the sky or a tree branch to sing no more…except one.

A large, solitary bird suddenly swoops into the yard and flies right up to me, like we are old friends. I hold out my hand, and he lands on it. I pet him and ruffle his feathers. He has only one eye. He turns his single eye upon me and studies me.  Then, he speaks: “You are about to make your breakthrough. You must remain strong.”

After I woke up from this profound dream, things got even stranger.  I couldn’t sleep anymore, so I started making my coffee and preparing for my day. When I went to check my phone, I saw that I had one “missed call” in the middle of the night, from a number I don’t know. I hadn’t heard the call, since my ringer had been turned off. The city the number had been dialed from:   Strong.

MissedCall

The phone call, of course, was probably just your typical “wrong number” misdial.  But the timing of the missed call coupled with the name of the city was pretty remarkable, and only served to echo the declaration of the dream:  that I must stay STRONG as I deal with a current painful situation and what is still to come.  I never even knew there WAS a Strong, Arkansas.  Some would say, “An incredible coincidence.”  Others would say, “There are no coincidences.”  But even as I was having the dream, something shifted inside me.  I knew, whole-heartedly, that I was receiving a very important message.  People could debate it, but whether it was God, chance, or just my own subconscious is completely irrelevant.  I got the message loud and clear.

Many of my friends attempted to “analyze” or “interpret” the dream, but I knew instinctively and immediately what was being represented and what I must do…

The dead birds symbolize chances missed/opportunities ignored/bad choices/failed attempts.  Birds, also commonly associated with freedom (flight), were the perfect symbol to express my feeling that all chances at freedom, success, or happiness in my life have expired.  The courtyard, in contrast, is lush, alive, and beautiful.  The courtyard itself represents ME — so much potential…but filled with so much failure, death, and disappointment.  Then, there is the LIVE bird.  It flies straight to me to provide empathy and advice.  It is rough and ragged in its appearance, but it still IS…it perseveres, despite the beatings life has offered it. The number ONE is repeated — one live bird, one eye — placing an emphasis on FOCUS, or as one of my friends put it, “singularity of purpose.” 

The presence of the living bird in this dream is a message in itself:  there IS still a chance here, in this garden of deceased dreams.  The intense gaze of the bird – through its one eye – lets me know that I must pay attention…that I must listen to, believe in, and ACT UPON what he is about to say with every fiber of my being.  The verbal message is simple enough to understand — that positive change is coming, if I hold steady.  But the LARGER, implied meaning is clear to me through the setting, (the sky is overcast during the dream), the manner in which the bird speaks, and my intuition.  And the message is THIS:  Yes, it is still possible to break through, to be transformed, to be your best, happiest, most authentic self and live the life you wish to live.  But you better do it right this time.  You have some hard choices to make, and you better make CONSCIOUS choices.  Stop trying to make everyone ELSE happy — you have to choose what is right for YOU.  And sister, are you in for a storm, because it’s only gonna get worse before it gets better.  Big transformation always comes with a hefty amount of loss, fear, and pain.  You will feel that you are about to break before you BREAK THROUGH.  But don’t give up.

I don’t plan to.

Aren’t dreams a beautiful thing?  🙂

Until next time,

Jenn

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s